Aku macam boring ah niari. School was ok lar..macam gitu2 jugak..so fast dah Wednesday later..haiyoh. Cuma macam hari nie aku tak bersemangat. Aku rasa sebab tak cukup tido and also cos tadi sampai rumah later than usual cos aku habis tuition lambat sikit...around 10.30 instead of the usual 10 pm. Furthermore bapak aku malas nak amik so aku naik bas lagik...gedebak gedebuk dah kul 11.15 aku sampai rumah. Damn...besok (or later) dah Wednesday. Hmmm...kenapalah aku gi tarok aku leh gi for that dinner? Kan dah macam bodoh gitu...aku tak sure if aku will enjoy it in the 1st place. Baru 3-4 weeks aku in school...lom kenal sumer orang yet. But well...slowly lar...bit by bit.

Actually aku nie tengah lepaskan geram. Cita2 original nak jadi penulis, tapi terpleot jadi checher lak. Takpelah...lepas serve bond leh go freelance. Tu pon kalau tak malas. Nie lah pasal aku ade journal kasi some pple tengok. Promote sikit ar...cos journal nie macam story aku. It's like a book that I'm writing continuously. Even though it's a journal, I'm not that dense to disclose everything in here...relax. There are still lotsa things playing at the back of my mind.

Hmmm...I'm wondering whether I have duty in the hols? Hope not...well, have to find out for myself. Anyhow, I intend to relax and go out by myself during the hols. Been there, done that but I wanna do it again. It's fun connecting with yourself. I enjoy doing that...not many chances to do that once you're a twosome, unless you're clever and manipulative enough to get the other half to respect your personal space. In other words, well...figure that one out yourself.

Oh yah...I'm still having doubts about the 'R' word. Hmmm...interest has been expressed but then I'm afraid of going through it again. Phobia? But I've never had family members who went through such disastrous ones. Hmmm...could it be that Elni was right? That I can't commit? But then how would she know me better than me? Okay, she was just giving a suggestion...don't be stoopid Suhaila!~ Hmmmmmm...maybe cos I'm not ready? Yah well...that's what I've been thinking. And that's why precisely I intend to take about a year or so off from the 'R' thing. But then the interested party...can wait or not? Hm...ah...can't please everyone can I? The hell...I'm in this for me, me and ME! Oh, what would I do without me?~ *evil smirk* Bless Sharmeen...such a smart ass...she's smart smart smart...witty witty witty. She deserves the nick out_witt more than me. Eh...but she doesn't know out_witt! Damn. Is she doing what I did last/this year? Professional idling? Gawd...I love that. Not love with a 'd' cos I DO love it! It doesn't help to roll in the dough but heck...it's a good life if you're in it. Wahahahahhaa...!

Okay enuff already.