I went out with the pakcik and Azila as usual yesterday and we had a great time. It felt so great to get out and release all that negative energy by spending money! Yah we kinda shopped and dunno-what but then so what? I don't even know if I'm still gonna be working next month or next year. It's so scary. Actually death is even scarier although technically it isn't that scary cos you know you're gonna die someday but you just don't know when. And yeah I did contemplate on s------ cos I just felt so stressed up. In fact I just went all teary-eyed again just now...I didn't know why. It just flowed. I couldn't stop it. Just thinking about it makes me sad. Judgemental bitch. No...bitch is too nice a word. It should be something else worse than that but right now I can only think of slut and it doesn't even come close. And no use asking Epul cos his vocab power is down at the moment too. Okay I need Sharmeen...she's just great at this. Darn.

I need help! Seriously...can anyone recommend me a good psychiatrist? I'm going nuts and I'm not even trying. =<