(silence)

And that was my impression of that cartoon typewriter on Sesame Street.

By right, I should be stressed. Heck, I am stressed. But perhaps I'm such one helluva slacker that I don't feel so much stress that I'm supposed to. My ELE assignment is due this Friday and I haven't even gotten down to it. Tsk. That's my major worry. I have the habit of completing work at the last minute and when I get the grade, it's just what I always expect. *smirk*

But I shall not talk about this. Why should I always whine about work when I can squeal all the itsy bitsy juicy details on he-shes, otherwise known as bapoks?

First of all, I should apologise to one of my friends on behalf of those involved for not waiting. Secondly, yes I had a bloody GREAT time spying on bapoks. Hah!

It all started when I realised that I had forgotten to bring my favourite "Whisper" in anticipation of the monthly cycle. So we decided to make it the major excuse for travelling to 7-11.

When we had bought all the basic necessities (note chewy candy, peachy Qoo, Mitsuya sticks, banana chocolate etc), we decided to take a nice quiet walk to the end of Changi Beach near the jetty. It was a humid night with the moon glowing brightly, showing off its golden radiance.

The four of us occupied a single bench. Don't ask us how we occupied it, cos as far as I remembered, Limah and me did most of the sitting while frog prince leaned against the back of the bench and pakcik rotated between sitting down and squatting. We shared stories and experiences and at times we burst out in guffaws. Reminiscence always has its effects.

Glancing at my watch, I realised that we had spent close to an hour fifteen minutes there. We then decided to start our Huge Spy Mission.

Armed with sweets and tidbits, we made our way towards the darkness of the park near the KTV-styled hawker centre. Already we spotted a lanky well-endowed "woman" slowly sashaying ahead of us. Passing by, we caught a glimpse of her face and silently agreed in unison that she was definitely C grade material. *grin* Meaning? Great shape but terrible look. You can tell straightaway that "she" is a "he".

Next, we arrived at the carpark which was near the rubbish house. The disgusting smell was enough to make us puke and we wondered how on earth could they do it behind the bushes, near the rubbish house with such an odour about. We noticed 2 he-shes, waiting for customers, and I'd bet if Limah and me weren't there, they probably would have made their moves on the guys. Yikes. Can't believe us gerls were life-savers. *chuckle* In any case, those 2 "lay-dees" weren't too bad-looking, but I guess they just didn't qualify for the A grade. Therefore, they had to make do with being B grades. (That's just my conclusion.)

Making a second trip to 7-11 to get some soap, froggie and me decided to wait outside while the other two hunted for Dettols and Luxes. It was then that I noticed the one at the head of the queue. I almost couldn't recognise "her" from the back but once she turned, goodness, it was just like a scene from "To Wong Foo, thanks for everything. Love, Julie Newmar.." only Swayze, Snipes and Leguizamo made better-looking women! Her pimp was waiting outside too, and all the time, he was urging her to hurry up. Customer waiting, no doubt.

Froggie and me also witnessed a negotiation between a rather tight-looking he-she and a bangla. Least, I think it was a bangla. Kinda hard to see when the surroundings are half-lighted and you're half-blind.

Moving on, we finally proceeded to the grade A area, which was slowly filling up on cars and other vehicles, rounding for potential one-night stands. Pakcik and me had difficulty in containing our giggles when a he-she strutted past in white tights and stillettos and exclaimed, "Mah, kau tengoklah..tadi ada kereta tu kacau akuuu!"

pakcik and me : Gulp gulp gulp.

(a few seconds later)

pakcik and me : Muahahahaha!

Amazingly, there were 1 or 2 families complete with children and snacks, sitting down on large flat stones or in their vehicles, as if enjoying a picnic.

Beautiful Saturday night. *evil grin*